I love you so much that I’m going to train wild and vicious dogs to pronounce one syllable each of a love poem that I’m gonna write for you, and it’s gonna be the first poem you ever read. You’re gonna hear it when they bark it at you, one syllable at a time, right after they tear up your favorite couch with their teeth and with their paws. Their paws are sharp because they’re wild, vicious dogs. They don’t know no better. What you do with the dogs is up to you, I’m not gonna want them anymore after they profess my love for you. I’ll be too embarrassed to feed them or to wash them or play with them or take them outside to shit. They’re all yours. But if you need a new couch, you can come over to my house and use mine if you want I guess, if you feel like it. Just don’t bring those dogs. I don’t ever want to see them ever again.